Intravenous Caffeine

Totally Unfair and Completely Unbalanced

Now she’ll be playing a new role–Miss Martyr 2009

Carrie Prejean lands on her butt after getting the boot from Donald Trump from her position of Miss California.

Former Miss California lands flat on her talent

Ahhhh, Carrie Prejean–you sure know how to keep in the tabloids! Donald Trump finally–oh of course, everyone has said it already–said “You’re Fired!” to the publicity hungry little wench. She’s on the Today Show today, spinning the tale why she “REALLY” got fired. Honey, you didn’t get fired because you said gays shouldn’t get married. There’s a lot of people who agree with you and your Biblically correct opinion. In fact, I’d say Donald Trump also believes marriage should be between one man and one woman…and then another woman…and another woman…and another. Wives have a TERRIBLE shelf life. So I hope (and I’m probably wrong) that you’re not trying to sell that week-old fish story. It wasn’t because you had a naughty picture taken, exposing what caused a national scandal when Janet Jackson had a wardrobe malfunction in the middle of the SuperBowl. Remember that? Michael Powell (Colin’s son) practically declared it an act of terrorism that families should be exposed to such indecency. The CBS network was lucky they weren’t thrown in Gitmo for that!
It wasn’t that you were 17 at the time, and oops, you misspoke about the number of pictures there were. Hey, anyone could mistake one photo for four photos. No, the real reason is that after Donald Trump cut you a break, and another and another, you stopped showing up for official appearances and started making unscheduled appearances on your own, violating the terms of your contract. You were DISSING the DONALD–you were saying, in essence, I’m more important than this little crown thing of yours. Oh, you were sweet enough to his face, but as soon as his back was turned, you started playing Queen of the Universe and doing what you pleased instead of what you’d said you would do. As he explained, “To me she was the sweetest thing. Everyone else — she treated like s**t.” And that’s why you’re just not good enough to represent everything that’s good about California–because you’re such an asshole that calling you a bitch would be a compliment.

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