Intravenous Caffeine

Totally Unfair and Completely Unbalanced

Revolutionary Grrl 6-Back to the Eye Candy … and please go out and vote tomorrow

The Grrl shoots a crossbow bolt carrying a rope into the building's overhang

Hey, isn't that a Big Joe 5 crossbow, designed for the OSS?

In our new installment, Revolutionary Grrl, having taken out the security cameras with … PAINTBALLS! … takes out a foldable crossbow from her pack and shoots a rope-and-pulley bearing bolt into the 1st International Megabank Building’s overhang and starts to pull herself up.

That crossbow is based on the Big Joe 5, a downsized, foldable crossbow designed for the OSS in World War II for possible use in assassinations. It is powered by special rubber bands which gives it several hundred pounds of shooting force. I couldn’t really show the rubber bands without confusing the picture too much, but they’re there in the second shot :) The crossbow bolt is a modification of one that’s designed for “alligator fishing”. It is designed to be shot into the alligator’s tough hide. It has a hole in its rear through which a double-loop-ended cable is inserted to carry the line to “reel in” the massive reptile. Our girl has fastened a small pulley-and-rope system to allow her to pull herself up. For what purpose? See us next week!

In the meantime, an article in the NY Times described the availability of “No Premium” insurance plans that the Affordable Care Act has made possible. Naturally, these are NOT being overly advertised by insurance companies. These so-called Bronze plans will fit clients who really cannot afford any other kind of health care and also will appeal to younger clients who don’t have any health issues and having come smack up against the notion of mortality yet. These will not be available in states where they aren’t administering Obamacare, despite them being some of the poorest states in the Union, because, well, socialism, Kenyan, atheist, Muslim …

Tomorrow is voting day. The new restrictive Voter ID law in Texas has prevented former Speaker of the House, Jim Wright, from registering. Way to go, Texas! BTW, “Sure, I know him,” doesn’t count as a voter ID, so make sure all them good ol’ boys actually have non-suspended driver’s licenses. Meanwhile in Virginia, voters will decide if they really want to vote for a Republican, Ken Cuccinelli, who wants to outlaw oral sex (New Slogan: Virginia is NOT for lovers) or if they’ll vote for the Democrat, Terry McAuliffe, who doesn’t. I’ve decided to vote for the Democrat so his campaign will stop sending me notices about how the campaign can’t afford to be outspent…

Whoever you decide to vote, go out and do it.

See you next week.

ANNOY YOUR FRIENDS! CONFOUND YOUR ENEMIES! PRESS ONE OF THESE BUTTONS--OR ELSE!
[del.icio.us] [Digg] [Facebook] [Mixx] [Reddit] [StumbleUpon] [Technorati] [Twitter] [Buzz] [Email]

[IRONY ALERT] After 150 Years, We’re Willing to Admit We Were Wrong–Lincoln WAS a Tyrant–Gov. McDonell

Grant: what if letting them go was the best idea? Lincoln: Whoa, Dude, that'd just be too ironic for words.

President Lincoln and General Grant discuss the war over a bottle of Grant's favored spirit, Old Varnish.

Renewing a Virginia tradition that was abandoned during the Occupation of Richmond by the treasonous Democrats, Governor Bob McDonell has declared April to once again be “Confederate History Month” in our fine commonwealth. In his proclamation, Governor McDonell studiously avoided all mention of slavery because the Confederate secession was not about slavery, but about states’ rights, in particular the right of individual states to decide if slavery was to be respected or abolished within its own sovereign borders and not be dictated to by an oppressive Northern government.

Besides, McDonell said, Confederate History Month was meant to be a celebration of the bravery and courage of those brave Southern boys who risked everything to defend their homes and the Southern way of life, and to mention “slavery” in the context would simply bring up a painful memory for all concerned, the descendants of the slaves and the descendants of the plantation owners who lost all their slaves.

Governor McDonell was proud of the fact that the Republican party has finally seen the error of its ways and has discredited Lincoln’s brutal insistence on the “sanctity” of the Union as the most arrogant oppression this country has ever seen. Now that 150 years have passed, McDonell said, the Republican Party no longer has to pay lip service to the images of its founders, a bunch of abolitionists and big government fetishists and has seen that the Democrat Party had been right all along.

“Just think,” McDonell added, “in another 150 years, what else will the Republicans support?”

[/IRONY]


Due to pressing professional needs, Intravenous Caffeine will only be published on Mondays until further notice.

ANNOY YOUR FRIENDS! CONFOUND YOUR ENEMIES! PRESS ONE OF THESE BUTTONS--OR ELSE!
[del.icio.us] [Digg] [Facebook] [Mixx] [Reddit] [StumbleUpon] [Technorati] [Twitter] [Buzz] [Email]

© 2009-2017 Gregory Uchrin, Intravenous Caffeine All Rights Reserved -- Copyright notice by Blog Copyright