Intravenous Caffeine

Totally Unfair and Completely Unbalanced

Here We Go Again

The Republicans hold the US Government hostage ... again.

Battered Wife Held Captive By Abusive Husband--Oops, I meant, Disaster Relief held hostage by Eric Cantor

Didn’t we just avert a government shutdown a few months ago? Weren’t we told that the compromises that were reached would prevent threats of government shutdowns for the near future? WTF? Now Eric Cantor is once again holding the US hostage to Tea Party economics by holding Disaster Funds–you know, relief funds to help bail out victims of … I don’t know… disasters?–unless cuts are made to FEMA–you know, the Federal Emergency Management Agency–the guys who help out with … disasters? And if they don’t get their way, BOOM, let’s shut down the government.

I’m sick and tired of this bullying and blackmail by a goddamned mentally challenged minority. Led by the empathy challenged Cantor from–I hate to admit it–MY state! You know what psychologists call someone who lacks the capacity for empathy? A sociopath! It’s official. The US government is being controlled by sociopaths–not the ones that the Tea Party is so convinced are leading us into tyranny–but the sociopaths in the tricorn hats themselves! WOOHOO! Hey, maybe we can get Moody’s to downrate us THIS time! Because if we threaten to shut down the government every two months, maybe we SHOULD get–A “B” rating!

Now, in a situation comedy world, the best way to handle a bully is to stand up to him. HAH! not gonna work here in reality-land. The only argument that Cantor could possibly understand would be a punch in his proboscis. I’d offer a reward for it–IF the poor schmuck who did it wasn’t going to be charged with TERRORISM and thrown in some black hole awaiting rendition to Uzbekhistan. No, the person who smacks Cantor in the nose has to be another Congressman or a Senator–I vote for Nancy Pelosi because I sure as hell couldn’t depend on Harry Reid for a good right cross.

Madame Minority Leader–please punch that asshole in his nose!

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