Intravenous Caffeine

Totally Unfair and Completely Unbalanced

Couldn’t Have Happened To A Nicer Guy

The GOP is sure all this slut business will blow over by November

Headdesk, headdesk, headdesk...

Much as I normally hate to do a subject two weeks in a row, the swift financial retribution against Rush Limbaugh is worthy of an exception. Seems Rush has lost about 90% of his sponsors over the controversy caused by his deliberate slander of an innocent bystander, at least temporarily. As you will remember, Rush called Georgetown student Sandra Fluke a slut and a prostitute for the horrendous crime of wanting to testify to the all-male committee fulminating over contraception about her friend who was denied contraceptives when she needed them for hormone therapy. Rush leapt to judgment on the girl, in an ass-brained show of ignorance of how contraceptives work, saying she was having so much sex she needed government assistance to pay for her pills. The rightwing ditto heads have repeated these charges ad nauseam and no amount of facts can ever dissuade them from the opinions given them by the Pope of Clear Channel.

This is the way free speech works in the free market. Rush Limbaugh was, is and will be free to make any ass-brained statement he wants to make. The question is whether or not anyone has to pay to allow those statements to be broadcast to the nation and world at large. With sponsors, he can shout it loud and clear to the entire radio audience. Without sponsors, he’s still free to shout them–but unless he or Clear Channel pay for it themselves, his soapbox might be … a soapbox. Seems Clear Channel has had to run Public Service Announcements on many of the commercial spots during Rush’s show this week. Dum da dum dum!

Bill Maher has weighed in on the proceedings and has tried to argue that Rush ought not be censored by the free market. Piffle. Bill is still smarting because HIS former TV show Politically Incorrect got dumped when he expressed an unforgivable truth: that the perpetrators of the cowardly attack on the Pentagon and World Trade Center were not themselves cowards. This was in the middle of US war-drum fever. Come on Bill, Americans won’t be ready for that kind of nuance before 2102, the year AFTER the 9/11 centennial. We still have people who said the Japanese deserved the earthquake-tsunami-nuclear meltdown tragedy because of PEARL HARBOR! And besides, what you said was true, just unpopular. That’s a fair distance from maliciously maligning someone by misrepresenting what they’d said or done.

Free speech doesn’t mean we have to subsidize hate speech. As long as someone’s willing to pay for the plug in the socket, Rush will have a platform. But, if no one wants to pay to have a person with that much bile representing their company, screw it. Let him try to get a gig on NPR :)

And speaking of Japan, this weekend marked the anniversary of that horrible series of misfortunes. Compounding the tragedy was that although Japan is one of the most prepared nations against earthquakes, the government had let down its guard on tsunami preparedness and had dropped the ball on nuclear safety measures AND spent more time CYAing and following procedures instead of reacting swiftly enough to contain the nuclear danger. But the Japanese people have shown incredible resilience and courage in their recovery. Last year, I did a short video to Yoko Kanno’s song for the survivors and I’d like to post its URL here againhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=na60p1P22rg. Links are there for several organizations that were involved in the recovery effort at the time. I’m sure they will accept more donations.

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Commies, Muslims and Nazis! Oh, My!

Bankers think they are a superior species to the rest of us.

Father and Son Day at First Global Megabank, N.A.

The latest news in wingnut circles is that Occupy Orlando (and by extension, the entire Occupy Movement) is being directed by (drumroll) The Muslim Brotherhood! Wow, militant Muslims AND the Nazis! No wonder they’re so anti-Semitic! After all, [irony alert] The JEWS run the banks!. [/irony] (Never mind those Yom Kippur services that were held…)

DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNNNNNN!

Not to mention evil-smelling HIPPIES doing marijuana and having SEX all over the place! And Communists. And Socialists. And thrill-seeking college kids with nothing to do (ummmmm, could that be why they want JOBS?)

And they’re all WHITE PEOPLE–when you don’t catch anyone else on camera. Not enough diversity! Like there is in the executive suites of the banks and brokerage houses (KOFF!).

Let’s turn the question the other way. Who runs the banks? Sociopaths. Sociopaths are people who think that they’re ABOVE the rest of the world and that the rules don’t apply to them. Like Skeletor, people who think they are Masters of the Universe. People who think regulations are made for losers. You know, losers like you and me.

Why are we losers? Well, let me tell you. Back in my youth, the banking interest rate paid to depositors was a standard 3%. That’s 3, not 0.3 or 0.03. The inflation rate in those days kept steady at or below 3%, meaning your savings actually made money compared to inflation. What’s the inflation rate today? About 3%. And what’s the going interest rate on savings for the big banks? 0.5%. One HALF of a percent! The banks take that money, lend it out and make profits on it. Very large profits because … we are actually PAYING THEM to hold our money for us. If we took our money out of the banks and invested it practically any other way, we’d get bigger bang for the buck. But we need to keep it in the banks so we can write checks and have credit and debit cards, so they have us over a barrel.

Think about that the next time someone smears the Occupiers…

Hey–why do they call them brokers? Because that’s what you are when they speculate with your money! Why did the banker cross the road? Why shouldn’t he–what are you trying to do? Regulate the banks? What’s the difference between a banker and a tapeworm? You can remove a tapeworm!

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Hey, Wall Street, We’re Fed Up With Your Bull!

The Wall Street Bull drops a load on America as the NYPD line up to protect the bankers and brokers from peaceful protesters.

Errrr, not exactly trickle down is it?

Well, I’m more or less recovered from InterventionCon over the weekend. Thanks to Onezumi Hartstein and James Harknell for their work in creating this fun convention. Shoutouts to Ari Pramagioulis of Success Communications Group, Murder Nurse, Moxie Cat and all the other great people of Cosplay Burlesque. Congratulations Mookie, creator of Dominic Deegan on your impending doom, err, I mean marriage. Fellow artists Elaine Corvidae of Rivensol, Jennie Breeden of the Devils Panties, the gang at Interrobang Studios, my next table neighbors from Singed Cat and other studios. Good luck to First Law of Mad Science and Ninjas versus Vampires. Hi Andi from a table whose weblink I can’t find. And thanks to all the people who attended and especially those of you who bought something from me!

Now, back to business. I thought I might do something about the incredibly tacky game show beauty pageant known as the second Republican Debate last week with Wolf Blitzer seemingly oblivious to his role as successor to Bert Parks (There they are–the next US Presidents!) Bob Barker or Monty Hall. Was that a debate? Then I thought, oooooooo the end of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, a much more IMPORTANT thing to celebrate. Darn, we finally will let patriotic Americans fight for their country without prying into their private lives! But then something that seemed to be slipping through the cracks came to my attention. SOMEONE FINALLY decided to protest against WALL STREET.

Due to getting ready for three conventions on three successive weekends, plus the disaster of the basement deluge (not to mention the death of my printer), the knowledge of the existence of OCCUPY WALL STREET seems to have slipped past me. As well as most of the mainstream news! As anyone with any common sense has realized, Wall Street went through a recovery after the banking bailout, but Main Street never did. That’s because Wall Street has usurped the reins of power in the United States and the common people no longer have a voice. President Obama promised to be a force for change, but his moneyed advisors led him by the nose to ignore the plight of the people. The Republican Party fights tooth and nail to protect each and every dollar of them, their true constituency, calling tax hikes on the luckiest of us “class warfare” when the REAL class warfare has been waged on the American middle-class since the days of plaster saint Ronald Reagan. The Democrats are little better, since our endless campaign season requires them to be funded by the money boys. Too long have the media paid attention to the faux populism of the Tea Party which is more intent on punishing their neighbors for a crust of bread than taking it from the bankers who have repossessed the bakery!

I am not anti-capitalist. Bankers and brokers–like the bacteria that live in the body and are necessary to digestion–they are a good thing when regulated. They provide the grease that the wheels of commerce need to turn. But when unregulated they turn into a cancer that sucks the life from the body, from the hearts and minds and hands of the American people. And that’s where we are today, and we’re dragging the rest of the world down with us. It’s about time to stop, to re-regulate commerce, to prosecute the miscreants for the crimes they have committed, to return power to the “little people” like you and me. Whether or not you agree with me, I urge you all to watch what is happening on the streets of New York.

But you might have to really look for it–it ain’t making front page. The money boys don’t want it there.

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Just Stand At Attention and Yell Semper Fi

SecDef Robert Gates defends the record of Marine General James Mattis who now only thinks it's a heck of a lot of fun to shoot people.

Gimme an OO-RAH!

It’s been a good week for hoof-in-mouth disease! First we have Lindsay Lohan, who was photographed at her probation hearing with her fingers on her lips and the words F*U*C*K*Y*O*U scrolled neatly on her fingernails. What she was doing with her fingers on her bottom lip is beyond me, probably playing BLERM with her lip, thinking the judge might think it was funny!

Well, I got news for you, Lindsay. The judge wasn’t all that thrilled. Would somebody PLEEZE tell that girl that this ISN’T A MOVIE! We’re not in Disney World anymore–the laws hold–especially the ones about cause and effect! Actions do have consequences. Oh well, maybe some time in the slammer (maybe 9 out of 90 days?) will have some effect. It seemed to work on Paris Hilton. On the other hands, if her friends are right, LL might spend the entire time in withdrawal from nicotine.

Then we have our new man at CentCom, General James Mattis. Since General Petraeus is taking over the post of hoof-in-mouth specialist General McChrystal, his old post at CentCom needs re-filling. Enter James Matiss of the US Marines! OO-RAH!! Another victim of hoof-in-mouth on the scope! UH-OH!

Looks like someone unearthed a video of him saying was fun it was to shoot people. He meant the enemy, of course. Even a Marine General isn’t crazy enough to mean it was fun to shoot at friends. Or random people, although that does seem to be the nature of targets in Iraq and Afghanistan. SecDef Robert Gates said we shouldn’t pay any attention to that video. It was five whole years ago and General Mattis has learned his lesson. He now knows it’s not fun to shoot civilians. At least to admit it. And if anyone asks him anything he hasn’t been given the answer for, he’ll just stand at attention and yell “Semper Fi.” Confuses everyone–works all the time.

Anyway, it’s been a good week for misstatements–looks like the only guy NOT getting into trouble has been Paul the Octopus. What’s that? Even the Germans want to turn him into sushi for not predicting them to win the World Cup? Hey football fans–he’s a psychic, not a witch doctor. Get it straight! Paul did. Besides, he’ll taste awful with wasabi!

But we all have to agree–Paul is one cephalopod who doesn’t just suck for a living!

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