Drone Wars Theme Song–The Road to Dystopia!

Parody version of Road to Morocco about the use of drones

With apologies to Bob and Bing...

Okay, guys, time to prove just HOW OLD I AM again:

THE ROAD TO DYSTOPIA
To the tune of “The Road to Morocco”. Dystopia is pronounced Dis-TOPE-ya for the purposes of the song.
For those of you who are too young to have ever heard it, watch this Youtube video to get the tune:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_w3UG6C_Mo

We’re off on the Road to Dystopia!
Pushbuttons do not hurt our spines!
Where they’re goin’, where we’re goin’, how can we be sure?
Just keep on believing that our motives aren’t impure!

We’re off on the Road to Dystopia!
Watch out! There’s no end to the line!
I hear our target’s where they do the dance of the seven veils,
They won’t be doing it too long with rockets on their tails!

We certainly do get around!
Like endless wars in Orwell,
We’re Dystopia Bound!

We’re off on the Road to Dystopia!
Look out! Well, clear the way, ‘cuz HERE WE COME!
As long as they’re shot over there, we haven’t any cares!
We hope our next-door neighbors don’t say five-fold daily prayers!

We’re off on the Road to Dystopia!
Thinking just makes us go numb!
They told us they would never shoot them off on US soil.
Our government would never sell us second-rate SNAKE OIL!

We certainly do get around!
Like a Jimmy Cameron movie starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, we’re Dystopia Bound.
Or a comic book by Alan Moore that’s made into a superbudget movie that gets everybody wearing Guy Fawkes masks,
WE’RE DYSTOPIA BOUND!

No cartoon next Monday because *drumroll* this coming weekend I will be in Artist Alley at Katsucon 19, at the Gaylord in National Harbor, MD, so if you’re there, stop by and say hi–and perhaps buy a signed print or two. For those of you who CAN’T make it, go over to my Facebook fanpage and click on the LIKE button to get updates on this blog and on my other art that’s available at the conventions.

See you then. Intravenous Caffeine will be back in two weeks.

YESYESYES–I admit it–I was lipsyncing!!!

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Report from Otakon 2009–How did I twist my neck so hard?

A poor schnook has twisted his head completely around from ogling the scantily clad cosplayers as his doctor wonders how to unwind him.

What happens to old farts at anime conventions

Well, I’ve just returned from Otakon 2009 (Otakon = otaku, Japanese for fan, + con), the biggest anime convention on the East Coast, and I’ve gone for a complete weekend without reading the news–and what a relief THAT is. The only news channel they played continuously at the hotel bar was Fox News (which I saw at breakfast) and the only thing I caught was Fox & Friends, specifically a segment on how the Bible was important to study in American History because after all, the Founding Fathers were all Christians. Naturally, they didn’t suggest that Americans might have to study Montesquieu in American History–the FRENCHMAN who actually devised the blueprint for the three-branch government–not only was he an atheist but he was also French. Did I mention he was French? Or that Madison, Jefferson and even Franklin read him…in French? Anyway, at least I didn’t see the segment on why the Bible was important for studying biology. After all, plants and animals are all mentioned in the Bible…
I went to my first RAVE! Now that might not seem like much to anyone under 30, but for us old farts that’s kind of an accomplishment. For those OTHER 50+ers out there, a rave is a dance where you don’t dance with anyone in particular–unless you’re already hooked up–as much as you dance with everyone at the same time. You need equipment–fluorescent light sticks, poles, swords, rings–and you decorate yourself with these and wave them in the air while you dance–which is basically bouncing up and down. Side to side movement is only for the brave. You can also do light acrobatics with your light sticks–and groups gather around to watch the mini-lightshow people are putting on if they’re any good. Now with everyone bouncing up and down–naturally the floor–on the third floor of the Baltimore Convention Center–goes up and down with you in time to the beat and the bass line, which are the only two things you can actually hear–I swear I heard one bass line using the Darth Vader theme from Star Wars DA DA DA–DUM DADAA–DUMDADAAAAA! Very appropriate at a con. Anyway, yours truly managed to get a blister on his foot from all the walking he’d been doing and threw his back out a bit by favoring his foot (no, not from whipping my neck to gawk at the cosplayers like the poor subject of today’s cartoon–that’s why you bring a camera–for a good EXCUSE to gawk at the cosplayers! Ooo, there was a guy with a stereo camera rig for 3-D photography there, but he didn’t have a card 🙁 phooey, I’d have given him a shout ) and made an interesting discovery. If you stand JUST RIGHT against a metal pillar in the middle of a rave–you can get a nice vibration massage from the beat! Some cute girl in a nurse’s outfit gave me a big hug after the Saturday night rave–A fun time was had by all 😀
A few shout-outs–I saw my friends Ananth from Applegeeks.com and Chris Malone from Blue and Blond. HEY GUYS good to run into you again! And a fun little occurrence. I was chatting with Kittyhawk who draws Valkyrie Yuuki–she advertised her cartoon as a FREE WEBCARTOON LOL so I told her so is mine and we exchanged cards. She looked at mine, and her eyes bulged a bit, she looked at my T-shirt — with my screaming caffeine freak matching the card–and then at me and said, “OMG, I’ve seen your cartoon before!” LOL I guess I’m not quite as obscure as I thought–anyway, it was a nice egostroke 🙂 Nice to have met you Kittyhawk and I hope I can give you a little bit more publicity from here!

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